Friday, August 12, 2016

Dearest Cracker Barrel Florida Store Number 287

Dearest Cracker Barrel,

How are you Daaahling???

I must say that when I paid you a routine (as in once a week) visit on the 6th of July. I was absolutely thrilled to see that you took the liberty to start celebrating my Birthday waaay ahead of schedule.



That's right. I'm a feisty black feline. A pumpkin. A delightful goblin. And on occasion. I ride a broomstick. It's Hot Rod Cherry Red with a Gold Ribbon tied into a festive bow at the handle.

Unfortunately, I am sitting on my broomstick today.
And my pointed hat has come out to play.

I had a happy little visit at your establishment on July 6, 2016. Delighted by the attractive display of Halloween's not-so-scary and adorably cutesey side (never been a fan of haunting and gore).
A short little witch who's design dates back to Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs.
A dimly lit Jack-O-Lantern gazing back at me with all of his October charm.
Friendly ghost that spin around and dance when you pass them by.
And Halloween theme'd tchotchkes all around.
Playful and delightful little things like that almost make me forget that I'm an adult.

And I'm...well...Adulting.

Like leasing an apartment...
and owning a vehicle...
which require paying bills...
which requires a job...
which comes with a standard lunch break...
Because...you know...regulations.

I was enjoying one of those regulated lunch breaks when I paid your restaurant a visit. Store number 287 in Florida. Wise and healthy food choices is also a part of adulting (goodbye french fries) so staying true to my light weight and vegetarian diet. I ordered one of my absolute favorite entrées on you menu.

Southern Grilled Chicken Salad.
Hold the chicken.
Extra Deviled Eggs
One extra wedge of cheese.

I've ordered your salad this way at least twice before at your West Palm Beach location. Made right to order and delicious. So I knew store number 287 wouldn't let me down.

Well....

I THOUGHT.

Store number 287. I've already spewed my thorough dissatisfaction several times before. So for the sake of simplification. I have decided to make you a checklist.

1.     If a customer calls at 11:30A.M. to place an order for a salad. And arrives at 12:15P.M. An EXTRA 20 minute wait upon arrival is unacceptable.

2.     If said customer expresses that they are a vegetarian. Please remove all of the chicken from the salad. I mean c'mon its a sliced breast.



(Website Advertisement Photo)

3.     Its a salad...Not mac and cheese. Not a Grilled cheese. Not a Philly Cheese Steak. Not lasagna. Please don't smother it in shredded cheddar. One extra wedge of would have been nice. Because...you know...that's what I ordered.

4.     Extra DEVILED eggs. Not two random boiled eggs. How boring is that??? And its...you know...not what I ordered.

5.     C'MON WHAT PART OF VEGETARIAN DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND????









This vegetarian's source extra protein comes from eggs and cheese. Not roaches.

And

6.     If you're going to offer me a free meal to compensate...




Please make sure you pass inspection FIRST  <----- Inspector's Report two days later, after I reported them.

https://www.myfloridalicense.com/inspectionDetail.asp?InspVisitID=5990666&id=2229769




Love Always,
Li.Ree










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